From the Desk of Hugh Hefner
It's not everyday I write a letter like this. However, I found it important. Recently, I learned that you are no longer receiving issues of PLAYBOY at home. If you don't mind me saying, I'm a bit surprised.
I created PLAYBOY for people like yourself who want to get the most out of life - that's why I'm sorry to hear that your subscription has run out. As a busy person myself, I understand how it could have been a simple oversight.
No, Hef, I'm the one who's sorry. The Atlantic recently displaced your fine periodical in my household. It was a simple numbers game, and while boobies are nice, I've recently found myself disinterested in most of the words contained outside of the Forum section in your magazine. It was a rapid falling out of favor you and I had, and I'm not entirely sure what accounts for it. Not so long ago on this very blog I believe I said I would happily receive Playboy and SI for the remainder of my life, and now, oops, both subscriptions have lapsed. Perhaps we shall meet again some years down the line when images of naked women under the age of thirty have an entirely foreign and abstract quality.